Boondock Saints II: All Saints Day

The first Boondock Saints was a glorious symphony of blood and bullets, a dance of gun smoke and glory.

Boondock Saints II is a mediocre pop ballad made by a band you once liked.

The Saints have been hiding out in Ireland, forgetting their past, when someone calls them back to Boston by pumping their favorite priest full of lead. From there it is pretty much the same old song and dance.

The Saints get a decidedly non-Irish sidekick to help them out and be the comic relief while they aren't fighting, the same doofy cops bungle the case (albeit intentionally this time), and charismatic FBI special agent Eunice (think William DaFoe but hotter and with more boobs) is sent in and ends up helping out. The Saints once again take down the mafia even though all their TV and rope-based plans fall to bits, and the gun fights are done in slow-motion while Eunice walks around explaining what happened.

Can't decide if the movie was halfhearted or trying too hard, but either way it falls short. It's the same shtick but with cheaper parts.

To its credit, though, the gun fights are still entertaining, the dialogue is still filled with incredible accents and amusing cursing, and the icing on the cake is that the entire cast is back (even the cat that Rocco shot makes a cameo).

It should also be noted that Clifton Collins, Jr. does a good job of being the crazy-eyed, Mexican-and-proud sidekick to the Saints, and like I said, when the brothers aren't making you chuckle with "fuck"-filled arguments, he has the funny base covered.

It was entertaining, and if it didn't have to stand in the shadow of the first movie, it might have been good. I give it a 2.5 stars or maybe 3 if I am in the right mood.

Here's hoping the third one doesn't also lose the faith.

Kick-Ass kicks ass

Simply put, Kick-Ass kicks ass.

David Lizeweski (played by Aaron Johnson) has had enough of his dull-as-dirt teenage life and the muggings that punctuate it. Inspired by the comics he reads, he dons a green suit and hits the streets as the hero Kick-Ass, which in turn inspires ex-cop Damon Macready and his slightly psychotic daughter Mindy (played by Nicolas Cage and Chloe Moretz, respectively) to join him as Big Daddy and Hit Girl. Together they team up to take down crime.

The movie has what every superhero movie needs to be good: enough heart to be entertaining and enough violence to keep you interested. It has the same feel as the first Spiderman movie (a feeling the second Spiderman fell short of and the third one ignored): it's just about a kid trying to make the world he lives in a better one.

While Aaron Johnson and Nicolas Cage both do a great job, the real break out performance comes from Chloe Moretz as Hit Girl. Her action scenes are fucking fantastic and she talks like a seasoned sailor. She may be 12, but damned if I don't want to hang out with her. If for no other reason, go see this movie to watch a little girl slaughter the shit out of drug dealers while J-pop plays in the background.

The comic book jokes and references are light, but plentiful enough to make nerds like me giggle. The soundtrack does a great job of amping up the fight scenes and climaxing the drama. It's all around good times.

It's a great superhero movie: well-directed, well-acted, well-written. It's Batman, but with guns; it's Superman, but with fighting; it's Fantastic Four, but without all the sucking.

5 stars way up.

Up there with Up in The Air

Up In The Air, much like Wild Hogs, is a movie made for a generation that I am not a member of, so, on this rare occasion, I admit that maybe the opinion of someone older would be more applicable.

George Clooney is once again asked to muster up all his acting talent and play a slightly older but still very suave gentleman. (How does he do it?)

This time his silver-haired, lady killer character is named Ryan and he flies from state to state, company to company, firing people.

When an employee is to well-loved or a boss too soft, they call in an axe man. They call in Ryan.

You'd think this is where the meat of the movie would lie, that Ryan would struggle with the incredible emotional devastation that comes with terminating workers, but it doesn't. Ryan loves his job and he is rather good at it: he actually makes one or two people happy that their job is done.

The meat of this feast is that Ryan has made this his lifestyle. He lives out of a suitcase, knows the layout of all the airports, and has gone to some length to make sure he has no strings to hold him down. This all changes when young go-getter Natalie (played by Annie Kendrick) threatens to make his job obsolete, and when he meets the sexy Alex (played by Vera Farmiga), he starts to wonder if maybe he could use some real human connection in his life.

Jason Rietman, who also directed such quirky films as Thank You For Smoking and Juno, repeats his brilliance here. He does a job that so many other directors find hard: he lets the characters speak. Close-ups are used sparingly and there are no wide-panning crane shots -- the only time the camera work gets even the slightest bit decadent is the 3-second aerial landscape shots that are used for transition. The visuals don't make the film stunning, the characters do.

A solid film: dry, but with heart where it needed and an ending you don't often get in Hollywood. The only way I could have enjoyed this story of a middle-aged man watching the world go by more is if I was middle-aged man, but I am still in my 20s, so it missed the mark there (I'll forgive it though).

I give it a 3.5.

Aren't You Glad I Didn't Say Clockwork Orange?

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